Here I am ladies, 10 days into my month as your May Motivating Mum.
To be completely honest, this has been my best month on my journey to date. Both my food intake and exercise have been on point. An observing friend mentioned to me few days ago that they couldn’t believe how much my nutrition has improved just this month.
I simply stated- I would not truthfully be a Motivating Mum and able to motivate others to do the same with their journey if I’m not 100% IN myself.
I would love to sit here and write about keeping on track all of the time, but we all know this is not as easy to do as it is to say.
I knew I would have one definite emotional and miserable day this month and that is TODAY, the due date for the baby I miscarried towards the end of last year.
I have not left the house, I’m still in my pajamas, I’ve cried, and I’ve crawled back into bed. Then I pulled myself together and made myself a Healthy Mummy Smoothie before all the kids woke up. Took 10 deep breaths and told myself I can do this and it got me through the morning. I know I am definitely not alone with this battle, but this is one that I’ve tried so hard to push to the back of my memory bank. The physical pain was hard enough, I was not one bit prepared for the mental pain that came with along with it.
Although we weren’t trying, (we had contraception in place to prevent falling and we already have 4 beautiful children) it happened and was quickly ripped away from us without any warning. I blamed myself for weeks, months and even some days now.
I know your all sitting there reading this telling me that it’s not my fault, but it well could have been. My Orthorexia was at an all-time high, my behaviours were at a crazy level, and I was training up to 5 hours a day on top of work and consuming little food. I look back now and can see how tired, worn and burnt out I was. I was re-coding my body to run on empty. How can one’s body provide the right housing for a child if it’s running on empty? Those were the wise words from my best friend. She is the one who tells me how it is even when I don’t want to hear it, she keeps me grounded.
So today is just another day in the struggle of parenthood. I skipped the gym to stay home and just do absolutely nothing which is so rare for me – no kids, no husband, no work, no housework, no phone, and even though I’m upset I know what I need is just a few hours away and carpooling with my best girlfriends to our favourite Zumba class of the week. They’ve all been here with me through the thick and thin the past 12 months. I cant even imagine how I would have got through half of what I have without them.
Mum’s let’s keep on supporting and motivating each other. It doesn’t matter if you have a bad day.Tomorrow is a new day!
Thank you so much for sharing your story and motivation with us Kimberly, you are an inspiration.
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