Ditching mummy guilt is the new black – but it’s a lot easier said than done right? We mums are pretty hard on ourselves when it comes to how we parent and it’s time we stopped.
Here are 13 things mums need to stop feeling guilty about right now!
1. School lunches – sending kids off with homemade goodies every day just isn’t always possible, so if you bung some healthy packaged food in from time-to-time it is NOT the end of the world.
2. Losing your nut – heck, getting cranky over someone spilling raspberries on the floor (puts hand up) is just part of being a busy mother who doesn’t need one more thing to clean or tidy. If you get too out of control just put yourself in time out, remember it’s a minute for every year of your life – for the win!
3. Baked beans for dinner – sometimes you’ve got nothing left in the tank to whip up a nutritious meal covering all the food groups. An occasional night eating the basics like beans on toast or scrambled egg is not the end of the world.
4. Enjoying time away from you kids – Even a trip to get petrol or the supermarket is a pleasure without kids in tow, especially if you’re stuck at home all day. Don’t feel bad for loving life when you’re away from your children, they’re probably enjoying it too!
5. Having almost zero patience – the more kids you have the more your patience levels are whittled away, it’s just how it goes. But as your children grow your patience does return, well until your 8-year-old gives you the attitude of a teenager.
6. Going back to work – Most households have two parents at work these days, it’s just the way it has to be financially and you are not harming your children by sending them to day care. They get to craft, hang with mates and if you’re lucky their carer might even start toilet training for you!
7. Stinky Saturday – Kids do not need a bath or shower every single night, in fact sometimes the act of getting them to do so causes more stress than necessary. If they’re not stinky from sport or mud play then make it a stinky Saturday or Tuesday, or Friday.
8. Screen and TV time – Enough already, I remember watching hours of TV on Saturday morning and I’ve turned out okay. Kids need to be able to sit down and just ‘be’ and so as long as they don’t pack tantrums every time you take away their screen time then don’t stress, enjoy the serenity while you can.
9. Whether you’re spending enough time with kids – Remember being shooed out the door after breakfast and only welcome back for snacks and loo stops? Yes me too. Life is busy these days so it’s more about quality than quantity, if you work from home often it’s usually comfort enough for them to know you’re nearby if needed.
10. That you hate craft – Not all mums adore crafting with scissors and making glitter or play dough creations and this doesn’t make you any less of a parent. Usually kids get to do this at day care, kindy or school so embrace your distaste in craft and stop worrying because you’re not damaging your child by not doing.
11. Always saying no – Unless you want your children growing up with a warped sense of entitlement then get used to saying ‘no’ at least 10 million more times, well or until they move out of home. Boundaries are good, kids love them despite their reaction to every time you stop them in their tracks.
12. That you don’t play diggers with your child – Give me a set of cards, a board game or Lego over having to play pretend diggers or cars with my son. This doesn’t make me horrible or mean, it means I have better things to do and know that it won’t hurt for my son to learn to play by himself.
13. Having noisy kids – If you’ve got boys then they’ll usually be making noise from the second they wake until they second they fall asleep. This isn’t to say that girls aren’t just as fabulous at being boisterous, in fact most kids are loud; it’s just their default setting. Ignore the stares and glares of others, well as long as the kids aren’t using their outside voices inside.
Bonus things to stop feeling guilty about: the fact that you can’t do fancy French plaits in your daughter’s hair so they go to school or day care with a plain ponytail – EVERY DAY!